Wednesday, August 26, 2009

World, Meet My Father

http://offender.fdle.state.fl.us/offender/flyer.do?personId=53732

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Life as I Know It

I've pondered recently the possibility of writing down my life story, with all of its twists and turns. Then I thought that maybe no one would want to read it. Hell, sometimes I don't even want to have lived it. But, I guess I feel the need to put myself out there for better or for worse. So I'll come here and write in anonymity about this life of mine.
I'm in a bad place right now. It's not something new but I guess that this time I feel more lost than ever. By all rights I am privileged and in a better place than most. I don't have to worry about where I will live or where my next meal is coming from. I remember that feeling quite well, however, and my heart goes out to anyone living such a life right now.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Friday

A rainy Friday here in Hawaii, and I have no motivation. It's like a huge vacuum has sucked the will to get my ass in gear right out of me.
Today is the memorial service for the Marines they lost in Brian's unit. I'm going to go, just to be there for him and to pay my respects. Loss is a difficult thing. There's nothing anyone can say, it's the final word; it just is. Everyone processes the experience differently, too. Some go out and get fucked up. Some retreat into themselves.
I mean, even if the Marines who died weren't their best friends, these guys are all subject to the aftermath. They see the families suffering, and know it could have been them. Rough times for all involved.

I read that they found more body parts down manholes at the WTC site. Didn't anyon think to check there? Whole operation seems pretty haphazard to me, especially with rubble and remains being taken to the landfill for 'sorting'. Good thing, though, that the powers that be can still use 9/11 for political fodder. At least something good came of it for someone....

x

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

And the "Hits" Just Keep Coming

Something is wrong with the world when CNN's "breaking news" consists of this:

"Christian broadcaster Pat Robertson apologizes for calling for the assassination of Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez. More soon."

Who gives a fuck? I mean seriously. An apology for an assasination call? I assume the dialog went something like this:

Robertson: "Ya'll, I apologize for callin' for the killin' of that nice brown fella down in Venezuela, and be with the starving pygmies down in Africa. Amen."

A different article goes on to say:

"In Havana, where he had met with Cuban President Fidel Castro to discuss ties between the two countries, Chavez told reporters he had never heard of Robertson.

Asked about the broadcaster's call for his assassination, Chavez said, "It doesn't matter to me."

"I don't know who that person is," he said. "As far as his opinion of me goes, I couldn't care less.""

He then remarked, "STICKS AND STONES MAY BREAK MY BONES BUT WORDS WILL NEVER HURT ME. NYA NYA."

Monday, August 22, 2005

I Don't Know Why...

... this made me laugh. What a slap in the face, check it out:

ELGIN, Ill. -- Philadelphia-based Comcast is apologizing for an insulting epithet on a bill.
LaChania Govan made dozens of phone calls to the cable company to complain about service, but she said she was never rude.
So the Elgin, Ill., woman was shocked when her bill came and had the insult printed where her name should be.
Instead of her name, the bill had the "b" word printed on it.


I guess the squeaky wheel really does get the "grease", ba dum bum CHING!!!!

Tuesday, August 16, 2005

Yet Another Reason....

...to buy Mac.

WASHINGTON (CNN) -- A computer worm shut down computer systems running the Windows 2000 operating system across the United States on Tuesday, hitting computers at CNN, ABC and The New York Times.

So all it takes is a little worm to hobble the media computers? Who would've thought. I don't know about you but I had my fill of Bill Gates' software turd about a year ago with the last worm. I found sweet refuge at the Apple store. Yum.

Saturday, August 06, 2005

Been A Long Time

What lop I have become. Shame on me, ignoring my poor bloggy.
Well, yesterday was my 21st birthday. Hahahaha. Not! At 26, I am no longer as they say, a spring chicken. But seriously, who ever wanted to be referred to as a "chicken" anyway? One thing I certainly am not, friends, is a chicken.

Let me fill you in, though, I had the most perfect birthday I have ever had. It was like something greater than myself looked into me and gave me everything I wanted. Yes, it was that good.

Hopefully this next year will be better than the last year of my life. I have a feeling that maybe it will.

Friday, June 03, 2005

WhAt a Pain in The AsS

Lawsuit claims exploding toilet burned man

Friday, June 3, 2005 Posted: 10:30 AM EDT (1430 GMT)

MORGANTOWN, West Virginia (AP) -- A man who says he was severely burned when a portable toilet exploded after he sat down and lit a cigarette is suing a general contractor and a coal company, accusing them of negligence.

John Jenkins, 53, and his wife, Ramona Jenkins, 35, of Brave, Pennsylvania, filed the suite Tuesday in county circuit court seeking $10 million in damages from Chisler Inc. and Eastern Associated Coal Corp.

The lawsuit claims Jenkins' face, neck, arms, torso and legs were severely burned last July after the cigarette ignited methane gas leaking from a pipe underneath the toilet unit.

"When I struck the lighter, the whole thing just detonated -- the whole top blew off," said Jenkins, a methane power plant operator with North West Fuels Development Inc. "I can't tell you if it blew me out the door or if I jumped out."


Bwahahahahaha.The horror! You know, when I was younger I used to be afraid that Ghoulies would eat my ass as I sat on the can. Poor guy. Good thing he's from Brave.

Monday, May 30, 2005

the newness ahead

Life is changing. I am moving. Away from this place and all of its history, and the past for better or worse.
It's kind of hard in some ways. I'll miss the view from the kitchen window, and how the sunlight falls through the trees at certain times during the day.
But I am off to better things. New opportunities. A new life.

Saturday, April 09, 2005

i RAN AwAY

tO the vacation paradise of downtown Waikiki. I just decided on Friday that I needed to go, get out and away.
I have a lot on my mind, plud my head has been killing me since my rendezvous with the golf ball.That whole situation has me upset. I almost got my eye taken out and all they can give me is 2/3 of my pay as a WAITRESS? Anyne who has ever done it knows that the money comes from the tips, tips that aren't computed in the weekly salary. So I get a $200/wk check. How do people survive on this?
I don't want to whine but if the manager had been doing his job correctly this never would have happened anyway. Unfortunately since the company is under the Federal government's umbrella there is apparently nothing that I can do. I really sympathise with those who have had to go on workman's comp in the past.I had no idea.

Monday, March 28, 2005

JUST WHAT THE WORLD NEEDS

BURBANK, Calif. (AP) -- Serena and Venus Williams will be starring in their version of a tennis reality show.


The sisters' off-court lives -- their family, friends and the glamour of big-time tennis -- will be featured in a six-episode show that is still untitled but set to premiere on ABC Family in July.


Not that I'm not proud of the Williams sisters, but seriously. Take it as my humble opinion but Reality TV is DEAD, I tell you. DEAD!!!

Wednesday, March 23, 2005

31 flavors.

I remember my grandfather, who always wanted to take me out for ice cream. I remember him pacing the long wooden boardwalk, watching me play gleefully in the golden California sand as only a child can. 31 flavors. 31 flavors always seemed a world of endless possibility to me. I heard a man was murdered there. A man murdered in a place so full of possibility. How I could never come to terms with that. How sad I was, thinking about him as my sandcastles washed away in the moonlight.

Saturday, March 19, 2005

Sometimes life hurts so bad that all you can do is laugh.

Monday, March 07, 2005

on the value of a black eye

And blindsided takes on a whole new meaning! So there I was, minding my own business on a sunny Sunday afternoon and out of nowhere comes a golf ball. Well, maybe not nowhere. I was working, if you can call driving a beer cart around a golf course working; when destiny gave me a golf ball. To the face.
I look like Quasimoto on a good day, but you know what? That's ok.
Reality check. Some people are born blind, right? So I guess I shouldn't bitch. In all truth I was lucky, It narrowly missed taking my eye out completely. Plus they gave me a good supply of Vicodin so I'm cherry.

kisses all

Saturday, February 26, 2005

LIFE IS A DANCE

So, here I am hopped up on Thera-flu, Vitamin C, and some Robitussin thrown in for good measure. I'm smoking a Menthol Light deathstick, listening the perpetually velvet throated Patsy Cline and my dear friend Lauren is doing my hair. Strange how these things seem to happen, but I've found myself in a moment. I was reading through CNN and MSNBC, absorbing all of the crazy shit going on in this wonderful world of ours, and a thought struck me. All of this is impermanent. It's all so fluid, so intangible. We live so seriously every day for the most part. There are bills to be paid, relationshps to be maintained, and in some cases children to be reared. Still, I wonder if maybe sometimes we tend to take our lives a little too seriosly in our quest to live life the way we think it should be lived. The way that society dictates, the way our parents taught us to even.
I don't know about you, but sometimes I forget the true nature of this life I've been given. I get so carried away with detail detail details and totally forget that there is more to life.
I am swimming, but what am I swimming to?
Don't get me wrong, I am not saying that we should shirk our responsibilities or ignore what we should be paying attention to. I am just saying that sometimes it pays to step back, take a deep breath, and look at things through the eyes of impermanence.

Monday, January 31, 2005

By God

Those bitches at Go Fug Yourself have taken it to a whole new level! I would be remiss not to post their new address:www.gofugyourself.com. Game on! Enjoy it, I know I do.

Thursday, January 20, 2005

STFU

Don't you just look at people flapping their mouths sometimes and think "Shut up! Damn, just shut up"! I write this about no one in completely particular, and I do suppose that I am just grousing. I'm in a bitchy mood and I'm going to take it out on you. I got a new job. I'm a WAITRESS. Yes, a waitress. I smile and laugh at jokes that aren't funny by any stretch of the imagination. I take orders. I now know all the ways steak and eggs are served. Medium rare over easy hard well done and burn it if you can, please.
The funny thing is that I like it. I do say this as I ingest my second glass of wine; but I think I really like it. Have you ever seen the Pepsi commercial. A bunch of hip looking people dancing to this song about breaking free. "I want to break free...". Well damn it if that's not how I feel inside.
I want to go dance in public fountains and get out of my car on the freeway and leave it there. I want to dance around like a total moron in a shopping mall while everyone looks on, wondering if I am having a grand mal seizure and need medical attention or if it's a new form of modern dance. I want to walk around with a huge dopey grin on my face and not have anyone ask why I'm so happy. I just am, ok. Shit, lay off!
Where are those people who through the miracle of modern technology, all show up at the same place and do something wierd for about a minute and then run away, back to their normal life. Hawaii could use someting like that. Thw world could use something like that. A happening. Totally innocuous, mindless fun.
Anyway, that's enough out of me.

kisses


Monday, January 03, 2005

Happy New Year

BOGOTA, Colombia (AP) -- Suspected Marxist rebels massacred 16 peasants, including women and children, in a remote area in lawless Arauca province, police said Saturday.

"The attack came last Friday less than an hour before the New Year arrived in the village of Puerto San Salvador, 230 miles northeast of Bogota, Arauca police chief Col. Rodrigo Palacio told The Associated Press.

He said the killers, believed to be members of the Revolutionary Armed Forces of Colombia, or FARC, accused the peasants of collaborating with right-wing paramilitary militias. The dead included six men, six women and four children."..........


Could we expect anything less from a group named the FARC??

I made it back from California in good condition. A little hung over but no worse for the wear. By the way, I highly recommend DayQuil or it's cheaper equivalent to combat a hang-over. But you didn't hear that from me cos' I ain't one to gossip.

Gears are turning in this mind of mine. Be back soon.

Saturday, December 25, 2004

wIsh me luck

Well, flying out to California. On Christmas day no less.......

Thursday, December 16, 2004

No, no, NO!

ST. LOUIS, Missouri (AP) -- The board of a St. Louis charter school on Wednesday placed a principal on leave after he had police handcuff a 5 year old and drive him around the block in a squad car to curb his unruly behavior.

Oh. dear. god.

"Principal Sam Morgan is on leave from Thurgood Marshall Academy pending an investigation into last month's incident, board attorney Wayne Harvey said.Morgan said he had police "put the handcuffs on one arm, put him in the back seat of their car and drive him around a little bit.""

And the police actually did this????? And with no permission slip..... Wonder if THE ENFORCER gave the cops a couple extra bucks to rough the kid up a little. You know, as long as there's no bruises?

There you have it folks, Missouri tax dollars hard at work. Save a criminal, arrest a toddler. Holy fuck.

BE THE COOLEST KID ON YOUR BLOCK, sign up for the official Missouri Squad Car tour.
Think about it, they could generate some serious revenue.

"Morgan added: "This kid is heading for the Department of Corrections at 5. He fights, strikes somebody practically every day on the bus. He's a constant disruption.""

HOW ABOUT SOME COUNSELLING, shithead? You know, maybe a little parent-teacher conference? Who lets these people work with kids?

On second thought, why not just throw the kid in the electric chair now and save some room on Death Row!






Saturday, December 11, 2004

SaNtA BaBY

Ok. I admit it. I am Scrooge incarnate.
Oh, to count all the ways I detest the Christmas "holiday". It's bad enough that virtually any public place I venture into during the middle of November already has Christmas crap up, but then I'm subjected to endlessly looping holiday themes as I make my way through furrows of lost looking parents with their screaming kids. To me, those shitty holiday songs are the B-Movies of the Music world. I don't know about you but Elvis's "Blue Christmas" makes me want to puke up what little holiday cheer I've inadvertently retained. Oh, and don't even get me started on the barking dog version of "Jingle Bells". Whose idea was that piece of crap?
Happily enought though, I have sought and stumbled upon refuge in the form of Monty Python's "Ho Ho Fu#k&ng Ho". Good old Monty!
I would have to say my biggest beef with Christmas is blatent commercialism. Holy hell what is the point? More latent house crap anyone?
Ever gotten a gift that you pawn off on another unsuspecting soul? Like the cashmere sweater episode of Seinfeld. Now that's holiday entertainment!
Well, if you'll excuse me I have to go watch all of the Home Alone movies consecutively to completely anhiliate any trace of a Christmas buzz. Make sure it's good and dead.
By the way, yes I would be that guy on the block who doesn't put lights up! Haha! Suckers!! Wait till you get the bill......


Sunday, November 28, 2004

Ode To The Internet Wierdo

I don't know you
You don't know me
Yet you wanna "cyber"
Still you wanna meet

I don't have a cam
at least not for you
to sit in your home
and jerk off to

You're an internet wierdo
Yeah I know your game
A,S,L
Where you from again?

Your face I know
I'll never ever see
Why oh why oh wierdo
Do you bother me?

Are there really chicks who go for this?
Or maybe they're really boys
Pass the anal-eze
Break out the sex toys

All I really know
Is I don't wanna end up
Duct taped hog-style
In the back of your van or truck

So, Internet wierdo
Pardon me if I'm rude
But In this day and age
it's a survivalist attitude

So have a nice day, pervo
hope you finally find
another friendly wierdo
to put that carrot up your behind.





Friday, November 12, 2004

BLASPhEMOUS RUMORS

WELL HOWDY. It's Friday night and my sorry ass is sitting here having some thoughts. I don't know what the fuck this mood is, maybe it could have something to do with the circus that is my life. All that's missing is a barking seal and a child molesting clown. Oh, wait. Got the child molesting clown covered. Wonderous!
Anyway, today I went to work like normal, driving 80 down the Pali to avoid being late and thus incurring the wrath of upper management. Fat fucking lot of good that did. The owner of the company I work for (which shall remain nameless) sat me down today and explained that she was giving my "job" to someone else. I knew I was getting fucked but I smiled and let it happen. It was just like watching a plane crash. I choose my battles though.Whoopty fucking doo!
I wonder if what they say is true. You know, that whole thing about "When one door closes another opens"?
Is that just more bullshit like when they say someone who's ugly has a "Good Personality"? And I don't know about you, but I've chased down a lot of rainbows here in Hawaii and never found one god damn pot of gold.
Methinks things can only get better.
SCOTT PETERSON was found guilty. Too bad he wasn't famous. He might've gotten away with it a la Orenthal J. No witnesses, no concrete motive! Screw a sailboat! He should've invested in that white Bronco....Although the concrete anchors were a nice touch. What a moron.

Friday, November 05, 2004

Hey, sorry about that!

Women recant sex abuse allegations
Man sentenced to life in 1984

Raleigh- N.C.

So, apparently two women have come forward to recant accusations of sexual abuse levelled at an innocent man who just spent 20 years in jail! 20 YEARS, for a crime he didn't commit! I admit it, my mind is once again blown by the audacity of some people.

"The accusers, cousins who were 4 and 6 when they made the charges, were expected to testify Friday that they falsely accused Sylvester Smith, 53. He was given two consecutive life sentences in 1984."

Dearly departed Grandma pressured the girls to finger the poor guy in the molestations to cover up for a nine year old cousin who later ended up in jail for murder anyway.

Their Lawyer....."[Gore] said he first heard from one of the victims this summer, when she wrote that Smith was being punished too harshly".

Hmm, you don't say? Too harshly??

"If the charges against Smith are dropped, he can petition the governor for a pardon. If one is granted, Smith could be entitled to as much as $400,000 in compensation from the state."

So that's the state of North Carolina's fix to 20 lost years of a life?

Let's do some math:

$400,000 divided by 20 years = a whopping $20,000 a year

All that, and he even has to petition for a pardon!

Unbelievable.










Friday, October 22, 2004

Americans run to Mexico for flu shot

Coronas, maybe. Flu shot, no.

Saturday, October 16, 2004

cHIM CHIM Sherry

Pink champagne is a godsend. Or maybe I just think it is in this moment. Whatever the case, it's doing the trick.
Maybe everything that I thought that I knew about life is all wrong. How can one ever be sure? The big bad world is a crazy place, the craziest thing being that there is no road map. There are no signs in the grand scheme of things, no arrow saying you are here (or not all there)!
We muddle through, though. We do what we have to do, I suppose.
I like my blog. It has no nutritional value, but it's still satisfying! Kind of like a pork rind. It is my vacation, my thought Disneyland if you will.
I have been learning a lot about the impact of thought on individual life perception. Sometimes I laugh at how funny the human race really is, and how for the most part we, (myself included), don't even realize it. If there are extraterrestrial beings of extreme intelligence out there I bet they just love to watch us walking around in circles banging our collective heads on the wall day in and day out.
I went to see "Team America: World Police". It was pretty good, I'd have to say the best thing about it being the Team's triumphant theme, "America, Fuck Yeah!". The tune is quintessentially American and in the tradition of the genre absolutely gaudy and over the top. The movie as a whole is by turns uproariously funny and dreadfully boring. I think Matt Parker and Trey Stone must have been sleeping off the drunk while the middle of the movie was produced as it seems to collapse as a result of the sappy underlying love story and dark cinematography. Brian fell asleep during Kim Il Jong's ballad, put it that way.
Trey and Matt: More cruel, biting satire; less weepy bullshit please! Your art scratches a certain itch for your fans.
You gotta hand it to the South Park duo though. Keeping people entertained for an hour and a half with sticks and strings is no small feat. And although some of the movie misses the mark, it's worth it to witness a ham-stuffed, hot-dog armed Michael Moore strapped with explosives burst into a screeching ball of flame.
Oh, and then there's the puppet sex.



Tuesday, October 12, 2004

France to jam mobiles in theaters

France. Ah, yes. There's a bunch of people with waaaay too much time on their hands. I almost forget what their last foible was, banning headscarves perhaps? Heck, it's not like they're out fighting wars or something so I can see how they might have the time to save the world one movie theatre at a time while simultaneously grappling the throes of that pesky religious headgear.
Maybe they should leave cell phone usage protocol as is. Might improve French cinema, who knows?

And the world thought we were crazy for buying Alaska.......

I think France needs to send ambassadors to Taiwan and North Korea. Have them aging cheese in no time. Who needs nukes when you've got linebergher?

Au Revoir



Friday, September 24, 2004

Musharraf 'reasonably sure' bin Laden is alive

WELL I'M GLAD SOMEBODY IS! HOLY SHIT!

All things Bright and Beautiful

Oh my gosh, it's Friday! I feel dizzy like a hippie at the height of the Haight-Ashbury psychedelesis! And yes, I think I just made that word up!
I have been bummed lately. If I may use that word, bummed. It honestly doesn't describe how I have felt given the current trajectory of the world at large. If you've read any of my previous posts you know of my affinity for sweeping the news every day, devouring the latest details of day-to-day developments. And maybe it is because the media largely only notes those things of morose quality, but I have been pretty disappointed with what I have seen.
I have been sad and sickened by the "hostage" situation in Iraq. Honestly, people, would any true God really want us to cut off our brother's heads to prove a point? And when it comes down to it, we really are all brothers in humanity here. Yes, we are at war. Yes, your country was "invaded".Yes, innocent people have died at the hands of all parties involved, but to kill for the sake of killing is purely animalistic. Our God did not give us free will for this sort of thing.
Given, anyone could say that those taken hostage did not belong there in the first place. But personally, I think that they have just as much right to be in Iraq working for whatever reason as those citizens from Iraq who have naturalized to the U.S. have the right to be here. Fight the war with those who are there to fight it and leave those who aren't party to it alone. People are detained. Civilian casualties happen in war. And like it or not, our countries are at war! No amount of frivolous decapitaiton is going to change that.
So, if you have ready this far, know that I am not a political person. And if this pissed you off, good for you. Means your brain is working and you are ahead of the power curve. Congrats on that.
In no way is any of this meant to make light of a very serious situation. My heart goes out to the families of those lost, and also to the masked men who have chosen to commit such heinous acts. May the Lord, (WHOEVER he/she/it is) be far more merciful than you when it comes your time.




Thursday, September 16, 2004

More blogging fun!

Hey folks, sorry it's been so damn long. What can I say, I had better things to do! What, you may ask could be more important than blogging? Well, I am officially now a "college chick". Imagine that! Yes, I managed to make it into a University, Hawaii Pacific University to be exact. My classes start October 4th.
I wasn't sure what Major to pick. How in the hell should I know? If my life has changed as much as it has in the past few years, how can I honestly say what I want to be qualified to do in four years (maybe more)?
So, I guess you could say that I bit the bullet and put down Social Work. Screw it. Sounds good to me.
If you have no idea what you are doing, I say fake it. It's always worked for me, and it usually produces some interesting results.( It could also explain why I got left in Nevada two years in a row.....)
I think that's the beauty of higher education. You can keep on going until you run out of money, and learn to practice more than one profession.Or you can just never stop going. Or you can pay god awful amounts of cash to learn to be something and never actually do it. It's all up to you!
So, I am excited.
After all of my bitching about my job I have decided to stay on part time. Consider this equation : Some money = better than no money. It pays pretty good for Hawaii and for some reason they seem to like me.Go figger. I guess you really CAN fool some of the people some of the time. (You still can't pick your friend's nose though).
So, life is panning out, slowly but surely.
Oh, yeah. I adopted an Ethiopian kid through some place called Compassion Minstries. I now pay child support every month.It's kind of funny to me. He's cute, though, and if it helps, great. I probably would have spent the money at the bar anyway. Or on Jeep accessories.
So, anyway, I'm sorry for neglecting you. Really. =P More later. For now, just relax and digest.






Monday, August 16, 2004

shit on an ass cracker

I feel like crap today. But you know what? I don't care!
I have shit to do.
So, anyway, this morning I dropped the jeep off to get Rhino lined. Which means that even if it rains the inside should never stink like rotting dead things again. Good deal. I hate that nasty smell.
So, anyway, I feel like shit. More later.